I do most of the food shopping

And I cant help but look at the magazines in line while I am waiting. This girl wants bigger boobs? Discuss........

Ya knowhat?

Pork Chops Kick Ass
My annoying and pestering friend, Ayhan, sent me pictures of some lamb chops that he made. To be honest, they were ridiculously good looking. Porn, if you will.

Its funny, sometimes you have friends who actually know something about you that you dont. I like writing a blog. I dont have time to, really- but I enjoy it.

I went to Safeway after work to see if I could find some lamb chops to make. Lets just say that the selection that I found wasn't all that appealing. But I found pork chops - sliced thinly. So, my wife found this recipe on one of our friends blogs. She changed it a little- hell if I know how since I was at work when she marinated it.

Anyway- dont buy the pork chops thinly sliced if they are bone in. Just dont bother. But here is a picture of kate enjoying the delicious meal that she marinated and I grilled.



Here is Ayhan. What a nice guy. Too bad you cant have any of my delicious pork chops my Turkish friend. More for me... I can tell from the picture that you are mad about it.

Dont know why

But its true, I cant help it.

She Just Doesn't Get It

You ever talk with your spouse and actually have 2 different conversations?

Here's the background: I married a VERY nice girl. Sometimes she shocks me. She just doesnt get how mens minds work most of the time. Think Martha Stewart-only much more serious and on Prozac.

Kate: Chris, when we can afford to replace the deck, I think we should go bigger.

Chris: You'd prefer a bigger deck?

Kate: Well - I mean, it would just be a few extra inches.

Chris: (totally laughing now) Just a few inches! Ha, ha! So you want a boyfriend?

Kate: Chris, what the hell are you talking about?

Kate, I am sorry honey. This was just toooooo good not to write about.

A girl? What? She can't grill!

So, Christy of What We Eat and I are now official nerds.

She has a blog about cooking, etc. as well. Recently, we were talking about who could make the best burger and we have differing opinions. So, its up to you my friends. Whose burger looks the best!

No pressure.... since girls really aren't supposed to be allowed to touch the grill! Ok ok ok-who cares, let the pictures tell the thousand words. Good luck to Christy.

Check out both of our sites to see the burgers and then vote for the one you like best over at her site.

My burgers were made with finely diced raw onion, Mexican hot chili powder, cumin, and S&P. I roasted some jalapenos and a pasilla pepper (of which for some reason I just have a pic of but no video). I also added some fresh chunky salsa from Trader Joe's, pepper jack cheese and red lettuce.

BUT FOR HONESTY IN COMPETITION.... I forgot the freaking avacodooooo!!!!!!!!!!

But who cares....

I'm the Kitchen Nazi

So my wife is going to be a stay at home mom. Along with all of the crazy shit that she is going to have to put up with day to day I decided to concede some control in my kitchen. I do all of the cooking in the house. Its not that she can't cook but more along the line of it's what I enjoy doing. So I decided that Friday dinner is all hers from here on out. She can plan all week for it. She must be rusty since she and I have been living together (over 10 years) she has not really had to do much in the kitchen. So last night I tossed her the softball and asked her to hit it out of the park for me.

I looked up a recipe for a crock pot chicken dish and pulled all of the spices out of the cabinets, the measuring cups, the crock pot (my mistress-they had to meet sometime), vegetables and sent her an email detailing my explicit instructions on how to change the recipe a little. In case you are wondering- YES, I am totally having some loss of control issues. I checked in from the office a few times today and found out that she didn't start the crock pot until 3:30! Holy Shit! What have I done? She didn't get to the few other things that I asked her to do either! I broke out in hives and had to breathe into a paper bag. We are going to all starve and die!

I got home at the regular time. The house smelled great. ( OK- I admit I added a little curry powder to the crock pot when she wasn't looking) The kids were fed and happy. I took off my coat and tie and sat down with my family. As it turned out, dinner was great. Life is good. I need therapy for my control issues.

She even took pictures so I could post about it. Isn't that special?

Who am I making dinner for?

OK. So I read other blogs. And a lot of women's blogs (they seem to be the people who do most of the cooking). So I know that most of my readers are women, and I'd like to get their take on this.

I found this funny picture in Google images. It was part of a blog post about what body types men and women prefer.

And the labels above hold true for me. It wasn't the girl in the middle that caught my eye. Actually, she wasn't even #2. Sorry Hollywood.

Ok, so there is an issue here....

I even bet that you made some assumptions about all 3 of them already. Middle girl- she eats tofu, works out, and maybe even really doesn't eat much. Girl on the right-maybe you think that she might be called larger but fit girl. Maybe she likes to have pizza and beers with her boyfriend or husband every Thursday. But she is not and would never be considered fat. Maybe she plays soccer or something. Girl on the left- She is not as toned as the other girls. Shes got curves though. She does seem to be a little softer than the other two.

So because I am a pig at heart, and love food. Which girl would I let have a nice dinner with me?

Middle girl- I bet you are quite spunky and fun but I enjoy cooking for a girl and sitting down to a nice dinner. I could be wrong and you might be able to out eat me but...you are a little skinny for my tastes anyway. Next.

Girl on the right-I bet you are a really fun girl to hang with. But I'm not really into blonds. Next.

Girl on the left- Hi, I'm Chris. Yes, I like a girl that looks like a woman but that isn't what caught my eye (aside from the very nice backside)... it was the "come hither look". Yes, and I bet you would help me cook and polish off the bottle with me as well....

SUMMARY:

Girls in the picture, you are all very pretty. Guys are easy. I'd have dinner with all of you since I bet you all have your own stories and are probably a lot of fun to be with. But really, the first one to give me "the look" over the shoulder wins. Truth.

It's now summer.... Beers & Brats anyone?

Ya, she makes me think of German culture too.

Okay, so seriously, who doesn't like bratwursts? I happen to LOVE them. There is nothing better than brats. I am sure that since they are associated with Germans and Oktoberfest, many associate them with the waning days and chillier temperatures.

Not me brotha! It's hot, you feel the need to grill out. Lets do this right. Good call. Here is how I do it.

Get an onion or two (not that sweet vidalia crap either), and some green bell peppers. Slice them thin.

Place in a skillet and salt them. Add just enough olive oil to coat after you flip them in the pan a few times.

Burner=HIGH.

Once you have them sizzling and some of the bottom ones are a little browned, turn the burner to low.

Cover and let it sit while they soften.

While you are doing this you need to have a pot on the other burner going. This needs to have all your brats (with a pinhole prick on each end) on the bottom and covered in beer (come on man-use St. Pauli).

You just need these to bubble - DO NOT BOIL until their color says, "I'm cooked!"

OH and by the way, I like to use a small amount (as much as will fit in the center of your palm) of curry powder in the beer. Your call.

While these are slowly getting their tasty on, you need to light the grill and have it ready. Once the Brats are ready (and you have turned off the softened onions and peppers and removed from the heat), throw them on the grill and blacken them slightly as well as toasting the buns.

Just put them all together with some grainy mustard before you add the pepper and onion deliciousness to the brat and take a trip to Bavaria.